a/the/my heart as metaphor and strained organ: aortic stenosis

  a reminder that this isn’t just an organ 
  a reminder that I still can’t play the organ well 
  a reminder that 
  while the organ’s broken 
  in some regards 
          the pill box filled and emptied weekly 
          the annual cardiology 
  in others it works fine 
  
  mine works fine sometimes 
          or somehow 
          in some ways 
      it feels weakly when it needs to//it fills too much 
      it is more than blood mechanics//it’s an engine that can leak and rush 
  
  skim read results 
  thin blood and skin 
  why I oughta thin aorta 
  then I order more Abisart       30 ABISART 150MG TAB 
                      Take ONE tablet daily 
  And she asks                          (Irbersartan 150mg Tab (AF)) 
  In the discount chemist 
                  (pregnant beneath the white blouse and nametag)
  if it’s for me 
  seems I’m too young 
  in the way someone has made her swell 
  revealed the body for more of what it can be
              taught an old dog new tricks 
  you kick-started the hard heart a Turramurra GP compared the beat of 
  to a London traffic jam 
  the maze and the mechanics 
  the cacophony 
  I’m coughing 
  The Knowledge that each of you possess of my arterials 
  a doctor and my love